How about them Oscars? There’s a lot of stuff to go through, so I’ll stick and move through some of the moments of the evening and give you a few of the highlights (and lowlights) of the 82nd Oscar ceremony! I’ve heard a few people say that the ceremony was fairly boring --- what did you think?
As for the awards themselves, there weren’t many surprises. I did pretty well on my prognostication, though I did lose some points in the ‘eenie-meenie-miny-moe’ categories of short film etc. The biggest upset of the night was probably Best Foreign movie. It was also nice to see the indie Hurt Locker win out the night over Mr. Pompous tool-face James Cameron’s Avatar. He didn’t look happy to see his ex-wife win! I actually thought that Avatar would win Best Pic, simply because it made a kajillion dollars, but I was happy to be wrong.
The Red Carpet --- how is it possible to be so inane? Why was Kathy Ireland allowed to speak? She took the prize for being the most uncomfortable thing to watch all evening. At one point she thanked a stunned Zac Efron three times for the interview and then stared at him in confusion when he wouldn’t walk away. Yowch. Also, was Morgan Freeman drunk? He was smacking his gum and seemed to forget his daughter’s name. I have to say though, watching the red carpet stuff just prior to the show was light years better than the cheap cable version that ran beforehand. Their questions were like, “so…you like to…wear…pants?” Painful to watch. And lastly --- why are we pretending that Miley Cyrus is a somebody? One of the cable interviewers even suggested that she’d be winning an Oscar someday. I wanted to reach into the TV and strike them about the face and neck.
If we’re trying to trim the telecast time, then why is there a poorly executed and pointless song with Neil Patrick Harris? If we have to have NPH, then make him a presenter. This was time consuming and lame. Wolverine’s song the year before was much better --- perhaps because Jackman can actually sing in key.
Two hosts? Meh. They were okay. No surprises.
The John Hughes Tribute was nice, but it went on WAY too long. And Judd Nelson looks like they scraped him off the sidewalk on the Sunset Strip or something. Heroin much?
Ben Stiller’s Avatar spoof was uncomfortable for everyone. Cameron looked annoyed. Apparently Stiller said the idea seemed better in rehearsal. I bet it wasn’t even funny then. Cameron Diaz and Steve Carell also had a poorly timed gag that fell flat on its face.
Kristen Stewart is so annoying. She always looks like it’s a big pain in the butt for her to be there. I don’t need her to be famous. I don’t need to see her. So if she doesn’t want it, and I don’t want it --- then why am I looking at her? For anyone who says nuts to the movie geek because Kristen is a role model for their kids, here's a picture of her toking some reefer. Role model that, chumps. (picture not from Oscar ceremony, though sweat pants is about the level of effort she put into it...hahahaha...)
And while it was cool that they gave props to the horror genre, that montage was more of a time bandit than anything. Why was the bad guy from Leprechaun included in that montage, by the way? He’s not what I’d call iconic.
I did like the sound editing montage --- this may eat time, but its also informative and not just showing clips from movies we’ve seen a hundred times. Of course, I’m a nerd, so I’m sure I’m the only one who appreciated it.
James Taylor plays a song for the RIP montage. A lot of weird and embarrassing deaths this year…MJ’s drug overdose, Brittany Murphy’s um…cold (yeah sure), and David Carradine’s autoerotic asphyxiation. Also I didn’t know that Dom Delouise died! I’d have thought he dropped dead of a heart attack years ago!
The dancing thing was sort of cool, if not way too long. They played the Best Original Score nominees and had the Legion of Extraordinary Dancers doing their thang. There was a lot of break dancing and doing the robot matched up with classy string and wind instrument music, which was a little odd. Though I’d have to say, what with all the flips and stuff, those dancers popped, locked, and busted the freshest.
I liked the tributes in the Actor/Actress categories. They are a GOOD use of time, in that you get to focus on the nominee, and hear some heartfelt or funny story about them. It’s the most personal part of the evening. That being said, I also learned that Forest Whitaker directed Hope Floats! Wtf???
Carey Mulligan…you are a beautiful flower and you should come and live with my wife and I. My wife won’t like it at first, but she’ll grow to love you. Then we can live out our existence together.
SPEECHES
Mo’Nique --- hardcore militant! And saying, “it’s good to see they chose performance over politics,” while true, also rudely implies that the other nominees didn’t have good performances and were only nominated because they have an in with George Clooney (who needed a haircut! Flippin' hippie!).
The techie speeches were the best --- in fact, the costume design winner who dedicated her Oscar to others toiling in her field, especially those that don’t get to dress aliens and 17th century royalty. Then she got off stage --- now THAT’S and Oscar speech! There was another guy who urged people to keep being creative and not listen to naysayers (I think it was the dude that wrote the winning score to Up). Then he got off the stage.
Jeff Bridges is awesome, man. Was it just me, man, or did he seem stoned? Either way, he’s awesome, man. It’s good to see the Dude get all the good things coming to him, man. Man, man. Man.
Sandra Bullock at least zinged herself. “Did I really earn this or did I just wear y’all down.” Well, you just wore everyone down, but I appreciate that you know it as well. Taking the time to mention all the other noms was also a classy move on her part. She’s a movie star, and this was a clear case of rewarding her for being that movie star. Here's Bullock and Best Supporting Actor winner Christoph Waltz. No matter the awards show, his speeches all consist of kissing Tarantino's rear end.
By far the weirdest part of the night was Elinor Burkett (aka Crazy Red Haired Lady) doing a Kanye West. Only one person is supposed to give a speech for the wine and “Music by Prudence” director Roger Ross Williams was right smack in the middle of his speech for Best Doc Short when Burkett, one of the movies producers, jumped on stage and interrupted his speech to scream and yell about the band from the movie. Apparently, the two haven’t been speaking to each other, because Williams and HBO wanted to focus more on an artist from the band, and Burkett wanted to focus on the entire band. She also accused Williams’ 87-year old mom of blocking her with a cane so she couldn’t go up the aisle to accept the award. What a nut. I draw your attention to the clenched fist and crazy eyes. Thankfully, Williams managed to keep his cool.
Anyway, not the most exciting year; other than miss wacko there, it was pretty tame. But I was really happy that I didn’t have to hear James Cameron give his acceptance speech in Na’vi. Plus we got to see his ex-wife spank him for statues (6 to 3).
What did you think?
Comments
I was glad to see that in Hollywood...
...you can make, invest in and direct in a half-a-BILLION dollar movie that makes EVEN MORE than that BUT still craps out at the awards because you really didn't invest any of those MILLIONS in the screenplay (not to mention originality achooPocahontasachoo), the characers (could Navii be anymore of a BAD pun), or the dialogue (unobtanium upsidaisium).
While nixing Sasha Baron Cohen as a female Navii was a good decision, I was hoping they'd get Dustin Hoffman onstage as Little Big Navii.
Carey Mulligan (breathtaking in that Doctor Who episode) and that young actress from Precious were more deserving of an Oscar than Sandra Bullock. I went to see The Blind Side with a wince in my eye, expecting it to be poor black Pygmalion.
Not too too bad
I missed the first half, which included(I'm assuming) all the weird parody stuff that sounded terrible anyway, but I thought they were decent. It seemed the people who were expected to win were those who won. I was rooting for District 9 for best picture, even though I knew there was no chance. I was pumped that the DUDE won best actor! About time! (He's either a groovy guy or he was for sure high). Little surprised that Dom Delouise died since I heard nothing of it!! I actually just watched 12 Chairs and Silent movie about two weeks ago. I also thought the horror montage was strange how they put films like Leprechaun, Twilight, ect. next to films like The Shinning, Rosemary's Baby, and Jaws.
great write up! I think
great write up! I think your right about the speeches they give about the best actors and actresses. It's the one part that takes time that you enjoy watching. And holy smokes was that red haired lady a wack job!!!
I can't stand those extended
I can't stand those extended ego-strokes given to the best actors/actresses. Worst part of the night, easily, just as it was last year. For me it is the epitome of all that is wrong with the awards season (which seems to last about half the year). Awarding high quality cinema is a good thing (though this is something the Oscars too often fail at) but please don't do it to such an excessive, nauseating degree.
And the love-in rang especially false this year. Sandra Bullock gets praised to high-heaven for her artistry 24 hours after accepting her Razzie as worst actress of the year.
Another mini-rant while I'm at it: I hate that Hollywood continuously pretends to be progressive. Babs, is it really something to celebrate that Kathryn Bigelow broke the gender barrier for the director's chair... in 2010! Or how about Halle Berry breaking the colour barrier a few years ago (heh, also pretty close to the time she won her Razzie)? These barriers would have been broken decades ago if that industry wasn't still dominated by white men at almost all levels.
I love movies, but the award season always gives me a strong distaste for the higher-ups who create them.
Meh is about right
Craig: Great write up---it was the first time in years I watched the Oscars in its entirety and I will never make that mistake again. Besides a couple of jokes from Steve and Alec ( i did like the shot of them on the couch in their Snuggies) , I thought it was pretty lame.
And although I love Sandra Bullock,the best actress oscar was not hers to win this year( i compare it to Julia Roberts Oscar win for Erin Brockovich---lovely ladies with just average acting chops who, as Sandra put it beautifully, had worn us down) Meryl Streep was fantastic in Julie and Julia(movie was average but Meryl IS THE BEST). I haven't seen An Education or Precious yet so can't comment on those ladies.
OHHH- and did you notice how ticked off George Clooney was with Steve and Alec--he looked pissed off with them most of the night. And please tell me George speaks Italian and hes not just with that woman because she is beautiful--
Last point, I thought it was wrong that they did not include Bea Arthur or Farrah Fawcett in the RIP part of the program.
Keep up the good work and heres to 2010!
best blog on this site!
Well said!!! I just have to add though, well i am not a fan, i know Hannah Montanna made like a zillion dollars a year. pretty good for a 14 year old (or however old she is). So, she must be a somebody to somebody. (I know my seven year old neice loves her!) And if Sandra can wear them down, well Myley's starting way younger...